Incident Log: Rollie Bunford
09:00 — Table confirmed level.
09:03 — Three biscuits present. Morale stable.
09:07 — External influence (Baguetta) introduces “fasting initiative.”
09:11 — Rollie initiates countermeasure (crumb sampling).
09:14 — Biscuit count reduced to two.
Conclusion:
Policy unsustainable.